I think when it comes down to it I just want to know that everything will be ok. That’s a hard task. Especially when I’ve pre-decided what “ok” means.
Where is there space to live? To inhabit the experience that’s at hand, rather than try to understand. What happens is we spend time trying to adapt reality to our understanding of it. We try to make perfect sense. We then try to rearrange things to match that understanding. It won’t be ok until it looks a certain way.
How much of your day is occupied by “shoulds”? Is there space to experience things exactly as they are? Do you find yourself making decisions when one doesn’t even need to be made? What if everything is ok? Just for this moment.