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Difficult conversations are always messy. Misunderstandings, miscommunications, misinformation. I often find myself looking to fix the problem internally rather than make things messy. It’s not perfect on my end but at least it’s only an internal complication. I can be with my own discomfort rather than making others feel uncomfortable.

Ultimately I find that it keeps me isolated. It just becomes a missed opportunity to try to connect in a heart-based way, and I never feel better or have my needs addressed. If the belief is that we have to deal with everything by ourselves we’ll never deepen our relationships.

It’s easier to think that there’s more possibility for perfection in maintaining the status quo, rather than allowing the mess of vulnerably sharing how things are affecting us make things better. But if we come from a place of compassion and love, we don’t have to get it right, we just have to have more self acceptance in order to struggle with the discomfort and challenge.